Jeffrey Campbell, Senso and Camilla Skovgaard available at Doll Boutique

Tuesday, 10 May 2011

Shoe far?

Women are obsessed with body image, fact. I'm not saying men arn't but all women are, the ones who say they arn't are infact, lying. I'm the first one to admit the insta-fear when I realise Summer is barely 2 months away and thanks to a more than generous helping of study leave I'm still spending two thirds if not more of my day doing zero physical activity. Still, the fact that those clever people at Reebok and Sketchers have picked up on this gives me comfort in knowing that I'm probably not alone. Every fibre of me wants to say how pathetic the whole concept of the 'Shape-up' and 'Easy-tone' shoes are, that they're clearly just a marketing tool praying on young women and  more likely depressed women going through a mid life crisis. Lets be honest, buying a pair of these will not save your marriage and will definitely not make you look even slightly like Kim Kardashian. Sorry, Leslie, 45 from Nuneaton married for 20years with 3 kids. And I can say almost completely confidently that I laughed at the whole idea. However I will admit that there was still that part of me - probably the part that convinced my 15 year old self it would be a good idea to try and survive off apples and one meal a day, the totally ridiculous part- that wondered if it would work.

The Reebok Easy Tones I will admit are well designed, after all they are marketed at women and overall, if its aesthetically pleasing we'll take one. In every colour. But sweet baby Jesus what in the hell were Sketchers thinking?! Reebok design a good looking fashionable work out shoe, and Sketchers come up with what can only be described as Dinner Ladies trainers off the market down the road. Really Sketchers? This was the best you could come up with? The best though is the price, the trainers are £90 and the flip-flops are £35. I have an irrational loathing for flip-flops as it is, this just sealed the deal. The Shape Ups look like something even the Spice Girls would have rejected in the 90s, I know what I'm talking about here. Not only did I own my very own pair of gold Spice Girls inspired platform shoes, I also owned white and silver glitter Sketchers. I know what you're thinking. 'just...why?' Two words: Britney Spears.

The £90 rubber and plastic nightmare from the disturbed minds at Sketchers

I don't even have to explain this it's so offensive.

My best friend and I have discussed many times the irrational panic that you get the first day you go on the beach on holiday and you realise you're going to have to get up from your beach towel and walk, yes, WALK from your towel to the sea. Yep, go on, walk those 10 metres past people you will most likely never ever see again in your life, in a bikini you haven't worn for 12 months. That's the moment when you think you probably wouldn't have minded buying yourself a pair of Reeboks after all....

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